THE BEST WAY I CAN DESCRIBE IT IS I HAVE RECLAIMED ME.
Discovering Mindfulness has caused a major shift in my leadership. I am a scientifically minded and evidence based person, normally I wouldn't get involved with anything I thought was woolly or not grounded in research. But, during a year when everything changed, it felt a good opportunity to give it a go.
a shift in leadership
Having finished a programme with Empowering Leadership, I started building a short Mindfulness practice into my morning routine. When I come into the office now and sit at my computer, I deliberately pause. I ground myself, I focus on my breath, I come into the present. Its only for a moment, but doing this every morning reminds me to do this at any time in the day - especially when I switch into autopilot. I remind myself;
“I am Beverley, fully in touch with who I am and my principles and am secure in this.”
I have tried to achieve this so many times in the past but have been easily caught up in crisis, driven and pulled around by outside forces. That no longer happens. I handle crisis and the daily ups and downs of school leadership with more composure. I am now able to respond wisely rather than reactively. I have found inner balance, tuning into my core purpose - what I call my “North Star”.
THE IMPACT ON THE STAFF - A RIPPLE EFFECT
The staff have certainly noticed the difference. Every morning as a senior team we now gather for 5 minutes. We ground ourselves and ask ‘what is it today that will make a difference?’. We take time to listen to each other, to open our perception, to be curious and fully understand the prevailing “weather” of the school. This is not a ‘to-do list’ question – it's a question about how we will be and how we will show up for each other and the children in our care, moment by moment.
For example, we recently had a pupil progress meeting and the weight of expectation was hanging heavy on the staff - the energy was draining away, the overwhelm creeping in. Although myself and the team couldn't put it into words – we knew ‘things didn't feel right’. In the past we might have ploughed on regardless but we now couldn’t ignore this heightened awareness - and anxiety - we all shared.
I walked around the school the next day, talking to the staff, asking them how they were feeling. I practiced being fully present for each conversation, truly witnessing what they were saying to me, resisting the impulse to interrupt, to fix. I was aware that in those conversations the only thing I could change was me – my presence – and it is these little tweaks that truly have made all the difference.
Those conversations on that day have had a ripple effect. I cancelled the staff meeting, instead we had an outside, COVID safe ‘connect and catch up event’ with tea and cakes. It poured, we got drenched, we laughed. I now know by being present with my staff, they will feel more connected to themselves, to each other, to me and my team. They will offer more and they will do more.
That's worth everything in this post pandemic world.
REMEMBERING WHAT’S IMPORTANT
As leaders we know what’s right and we know how to be - but we forget. I know that previously I had many days where I felt I was fire fighting, moving from crisis to crisis and - let’s face it - overwhelmed. I don't feel like that any more. Of course I still have those days but I handle them. Most importantly, I don't take them home with me. Even in the midst of significant challenge, I remember what’s important, and the things I am grateful for.
My next steps are to embed these practices and more mindful ways of working into the wider school. I have just appointed a member of staff as the lead on mental health and Mindfulness. We are also sharing simple Mindfulness practices with the children.
Just last week a little 5 year old who has trouble keeping his hands to himself and can be a bit difficult with other children came up to me with his little hands out. He put one on his face and one on his heart and said;
“Look Miss Riddle, kind face, kind hands, kind face, kind hands.”
That, right there, is what its all about.